Mark has just let Lukas go out with his stupid idiot of a brother. They have gone to town. Those two are complete idiots, they cant even look after there own kid and Mark has trusted them with my precious little baby boy. Did I mention that theres currently no traffic lights and unless you are really sensible its easy to get run over. Or the fact that Lukas is walking in town on a Sunday. Lukas is my world. If anything happens to him even if its only a bloody bump/cut Mark can forget sex for the next millenium infact I will cut it off and feed it to him!! Yes I admit it I am hysterical and I don't care. I feel better now I have ranted that out.
After I wrote that I sat and sobbed. Im a bit pathetic when it comes to Lukas. I just couldn't bear anything happening to him. I love him with every ounce of my being. Mark thinks I am, being silly and thats tough, he doesn't understand. When Lukas is somewhere that I dont know is safe I feel like I have had my heart and sould ripped away. I panic and I cant help that. All I want to do is protect him. Truth is I feel like I failed Leo I feel like I never protected him enough and Lukas is all I have left. No-one understands how I feel when hes not around when I cant check on him in so scared something will happen to him. I hate it when he goes to nursery but at least hes safe there not like with those two idiots. While they stop to light up a bloody fag he could wander off and anything could happen to him. Im his mum and I know him better than anyone and the little sod still scares me on occasion.
No comments:
Post a Comment