Saturday, March 17, 2007

Yet another shopping spree

I suppose I could justify it and say that it's my mothers day present but I paid for it myself. The reason is really simple, I have been feeling really down lately and everything is getting to me. I have a destructive personality, some people do daft things when they are miserable they turn to drink or drugs me I shop, and then I cry and feel guilty. I follow this up by writing a post here about it lol. Its very therapeutic. The consequence will come though usually in a form of nasty letter from bank manager telling me I have gone over my overdraft again. I pay the charge and then for a while I am good. I pay all my bills, and I keep my account at least within the overdraft. Do you remember the other night when I wrote the post about music? That's usually a sure sign I am about to go on either a spending binge or in one of those moods where I don't want to talk to anyone. I need to find a way to stop being so destructive I think the place to start is with more anti depressents. I can't remember the last time I took them. I am a very bad girl I never remembered to take them unless I was reminded, I run out and I don't have the energy to go back to the doctors. I think the last time I saw the doctor was the Monday after the wedding. I believe he told me to make an appointment for the next week, and it got delayed and eventually forgotten. Its often when these low moods hit I turn to scrapbooking I vent in my pages just like I vent and ramble to myself here. Holidays are hard for me especially this year its Keisha's birthday technically today since its past midnight. I miss my brothers and sisters so so much. I would have loved to send her a card and a present but knowing my mum she would have destroyed it in spite. I hate Mothers Day because Mark always seems to be on a mission to make it the day from hell (that applies to every holiday) we have been together 5 years and we have yet to have a single "special" day that Mark hasn't caused a row on and made me miserable. I miss Leo, Nan is going to hospital on Monday and I am banned from visiting her because of my latex allergy because she doesn't want me to get ill. She's off on holiday soon and I am going to be lonely without her I hate being in the house on my own. I guess the point I am trying to make is there are a lot of reasons I feel down and a lot of reasons I feel like I need to buy something to make me feel better. Want to know one last thing I honestly think I am trying harder to convince myself that it was justified than I am my readers. OMG I just realised I have rambled this much and I haven't even confessed to what I have bought lol.
Everything from this shopping spree came from Studio Traci Reed @ Scrapbookgraphics.
I now own almost everything in the store lol. I have bought element packs rather than kits so that's why I don't own everything. Tonight I picked up:
Superstah Alphas
In my studio: Joyful
Crayon Stickers
Blendstrokes
I dig Dirt Embellies
Heart of Grace Embellies
Super Boy Embellies
Essentially Fall embellies
End of summer embellies
Layered templates (now these I have all of lol) tonight I got:
Rectangles, Rectangles 2, Rectangles 3, Photo Collages, Photo Collages 2, Photo Collages 3, Onederfuls and Double Trouble 2.

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